Desperately Romantic

photo by Suthi Picotte

“I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”

When Harry Met Sally

How To Be Happy While Planning Your Wedding

 photo: bret cole

Over the holidays, while blizzard-bound in NYC, I read “The Happiness Project.” It is Gretchen Rubin’s accounting of what she did during the course of a year to expand her ability to take pleasure and happiness in her life. She has some wonderful musings on marriage, commitment, and love.

While this passage speaks to her marriage, it also speaks to what you need to keep in mind as you plan your wedding.

"When thinking about happiness in marriage, you may have an almost irresistible impulse to focus on your spouse, to emphasize how he or she should change in order to boost your happiness. But the fact is, you can’t change anyone but yourself. A friend told me that her “marriage mantra” was, “I love Leo, just as he is.” I love Jamie just as he is. I can’t make him do a better job of doing household chores, I can only stop myself from nagging—and that makes me happier. When you give up expecting a spouse to change (within reason), you lessen anger and resentment, and that creates a more loving atmosphere in a marriage."

Happy New Year!

photo by Victor Sizemore

“What marriages work the best? The ones where partners acknowledge, validate and appreciate each other continuously.”

While the above quote applies to couples married, it also applies to couples engaged—especially those who are actively planning their wedding.

On this first day of the new year, I encourage you to be kind with each other as you make your way through the wacky world of wedding planning.

How you treat each other during this time is how you will treat each other the time after your wedding. Your life together has already begun.

I wish you a happy new year—a year of new blessings, new happiness, new dreams.

Cheers!

A December Wedding At The Montage Resort, Laguna Beach

Natalie & Conrad - Short Film from living cinema on Vimeo.


Curtis Heyne is another of my favs. All you have to do is watch his video to see why. He's warm, funny, insightful, and a genuine artist.

The beauty and festiveness of Natalie & Conrad's wedding was the vision of Brooke Keegan. She will take wonderful care of you.

Enjoy!

The Common Sense Of Being Kind

photo: one love photography

I recently reunited with a couple whose wedding I officiated fifteen years ago. They look older but their spirits are as I remember them. Open, inquisitive, yet clearly defined in their ongoing aspirations. Jack Daniels joined us at the table and story begat story. It was a magical night.

As I was leaving, Frank suddenly asked me: “do you know why Renee and I are still in love?” Various answers came to mind, but I simply said, “no, why are you still in love?” He said: “we’re kind to each other.”

So simple.

He explained how they don’t ever want to lose sight that they are each other’s partner and best friend--not punching bag or dumping ground for the day’s irritations.

So simple. So deep in the heart of what makes a relationship “work.”

And this is especially true while planning for your wedding. In case you haven’t noticed, it’s exhausting work. Often times it is frustrating and irritating work.

That’s why it’s essential that you be kind to each other. This is your wedding. You plan together. You muddle through the details and the weirdness of it all—together. Remember--you are not the “enemy!”

Be kind to each other. . .

The Life That I Have

 photo; brandon kidd

The Life That I Have

The life that I have

Is all that I have

And the life that I have

Is yours

The love that I have

Of the life that I have

Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have

A rest I shall have

Yet death will be but a pause

For the peace of my years

In the long green grass

Will be yours and yours and yours.

Leo Marks

Chelsea Clinton included this poem at her wedding. In three verses Leo Marks echoes the sum of a life lived out in the company of a soul mate.

Simple Words, Profound Words

cheriephoto.com/blog

Before a ceremony starts, I usually line up with the groom and his groomsmen. I always reassure the groom that he has nothing to be nervous about. All he has to do is hold his bride’s hand and look into her eyes. I’ll take care of everything else.
I told this to a groom last Saturday. He smiled and said, “Why should I be nervous? I’m marrying the woman I love.”
He said it all. . .