When I meet with a couple, one of
the first things I ask is: “is there
anything you know that you do want or anything you know that you don’t want?”
Brad and Darlene, the couple I met
with today, told me that they weren’t sure what they wanted, even though
they’ve been to over a dozen weddings in the past two years. They said that they all had become just a
blur.
But then Brad excitedly turned to
Darlene and reminded her of the wedding of their friends Jared and Kathy. Darlene in turn got excited and agreed that
the ceremony had been beautiful.
However, when I asked what about
the ceremony they liked, they drew a blank––they couldn’t remember anything
specific! They just remembered that the
celebrant offered words that touched them and that spoke to their own
relationship.
As they chatted a bit longer about
the wedding, it became clear that they couldn’t remember much of anything––just
that it was a wonderful experience.
I laughed because they proved what
I’ve always maintained. People don’t
remember details so much as they remember the feel and tone of your celebration. I’m sure Jared and Kathy put a lot of thought
and care into the planning of their ceremony and reception, but what Brad and
Darlene remembered was the joy and love that went into the day and not the
particulars.
I think this is vitally important
to keep in mind as you plan your celebration.
So. . .
·
What was the most moving ceremony you’ve
witnessed?
·
What made it memorable for you?
If you can’t recall the
particulars, why do you think that is?
Let your answers to these questions
guide you in your own planning!
