Earlier this week I officiated a wedding for an out-of-town gay couple that had decided to combine their wedding and honeymoon. They invited just ten relatives and friends. The ceremony was held in their hotel suite that had a breath-taking view of LA. When I arrived, Frank clasped my hand and said, “I’m so nervous, I don’t know if I can say my vows.” I reminded him that there would only be ten people, to which he nervously responded, “that’s a lot!”
The point is, it doesn’t matter if you’ve invited ten people or twenty times ten people. It doesn’t matter if you’re straight or gay. A wedding is an out-of-body experience! And while I “get” why people are nervous, at the risk of sounding obnoxious, I have to ask: “But why are you nervous? What are you telling yourself that makes you scared?”
I know this is a heretical statement – BUT – your wedding day is not “the” most important day of your life. Your life together is a series of most important days. I think your wedding day is “the” day that can be a touchstone for all those other “most important days”.
With that in mind, here are ten things to keep in mind while preparing for your wedding vows.